As the festive season unfolds, loved ones will be coming together to give and receive gifts. Many will also contribute to those in need by donating to struggling communities and organizing events to lend a helping hand.
As adults, we understand that we give during the holidays because we want to feel good about helping others. But for kids, figuring out when, why, and how to be kind can be confusing.
According to studies by experts in child development, here are three ways parents can help their kids be more generous during the holiday season.
Show Goodwill
Kids learn most effectively by watching and copying others. When they see adults and what happens because of their actions, they figure out which behaviors are good or bad, and whether someone is nice or mean.
Studies show that parents who are kind and caring with their children usually raise kind and generous kids. For instance, talking to your child about the feelings you both had during the day can teach them how to comfort others when they are upset.
Continue to show empathy and kindness to your children. By doing this, you teach them that being kind can help those in crisis feel cared for. Plus, research shows that children are more likely to donate to charity when their mothers strongly hold these values.
With all the wars and disasters happening around the world, kids can feel upset when they hear about other children in trouble. To help your kids feel better, talk to them about their feelings and comfort them. You can also suggest ways your family can help those who are disadvantaged.
You might also consider bringing your kids along to help out at a nearby shelter or starting a toy drive as a family. It’s an easy way to show them how to be selfless and giving.
Refrain from rewarding acts of kindness.
It’s normal to want to praise kids when they are thoughtful towards others. You likely feel proud when they share or donate, and you may want to show your happiness about their actions. However, experts in child development have found that giving certain rewards can actually reduce kids’ willingness to be kind in the future. When children receive material rewards – like gifts, snacks, or money – they are less likely to help others compared to when they are simply praised or not given any feedback at all.
A smile and warm words can make a big difference.
Show appreciation for their character, rather than their actions.
More than 60% of parents say they compliment their kids for being nice to others. However, some types of compliments work better than others, especially when it comes to fostering kindness.
To help your kids be more generous this holiday season, compliment them when they do something nice for someone else. Telling them that you can see how they really understand how others feel or that they are a good person is more helpful than just praising their kind behavior. Kids who hear that they are good-natured or helpful often choose to volunteer more than those who are praised for just trying hard. This type of praise, called “person praise,” can help a child see themselves as someone who always helps others.
These small actions can help your child understand how others feel and encourage them to be caring to people who need help.
This might also make them give more during the next holiday season.
